


Slumber Hearty

by ToiletPaperPrincess



Series: Reader-Insert Shenanigans [5]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Comfort, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Other, Post-Pacifist Route, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive, Sexual Humor, Sharing a Bed, Sleepovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-29
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-05-10 07:10:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5576017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToiletPaperPrincess/pseuds/ToiletPaperPrincess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You've been having problems with nightmares lately, but if there's one thing Papyrus loves, it's solving problems.</p><p>(Can be read as platonic or romantic, with a specifically romantic alternate ending.  UPDATE: Now with epilogue!)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Story

**Author's Note:**

> Like I mentioned above, this story can be read as platonic or romantic, but there are some romantic jokes/thoughts throughout; it's just up for interpretation whether the jokes have a kernel of truth to them or not, whether the thoughts are embarrassing because they're unwanted or because they ARE wanted, etc. But the alternate ending (posted as "chapter two") is overtly romantic.

Papyrus dropped the pot unceremoniously on the stove, crossed his arms, and fixed you with a stern glare—all before you’d even finished your yawn. You covered your mouth guiltily.

“THIS IS ALL SANS’ FAULT, ISN’T IT!” He framed it as a statement, not a question. “I WON’T LET HIM SEDUCE YOU DOWN THE NEFARIOUS PATH OF NAPPING!!”

“have i been doing that? ‘snooze’ to me,” came a mumbled response from the next room as Sans shifted on the couch. Papyrus huffed in annoyance.

“I’m just a little tired,” you interjected quickly, stifling another yawn. “I haven’t been sleeping well.”

“WHAAAT? BUT YOU’RE SO GOOD AT EVERYTHING ELSE!!”

Despite how long you’d known Papyrus, you still occasionally had trouble telling the difference between when he was serious and when he was joking. It took you a minute, but—jaw slightly agape, blinking steadily at you, an overall quizzical expression—he was definitely sincere. He couldn’t believe that you were _bad_ at _sleeping_.

“It’s...it’s all right.” You shrugged, uncomfortable under his gaze. “It’s just that I’ve been getting nightmares lately. It’ll pass.”

Papyrus stepped closer, squinting hard at you, apparently disinterested in the fact that the pot behind him was boiling over. You glanced away, but then his hands were on your face and he was peering intently into your eyes.

“HMMMM.” Papyrus ground his teeth as he thought, gaze flickering from your eyes to the visible bags beneath them. Finally he let out an exasperated sigh. “...HUMANS ‘NEED’ TO SLEEP, DON’T THEY?”

Boiling water was spreading across the stovetop and dribbling onto the floor.

“...Yes...?”

“THEN IT CAN’T BE HELPED.” With a final snort—and firmly patting your cheek before he withdrew his hands—Papyrus turned back and threw an entire box of noodles into the pot. You watched the cardboard disintegrate amid the froth. “YOUR NIGHTMARES ARE JUST GOING TO HAVE TO STOP!!”

“i don’t think murdering that pasta in front of ‘em is going to help, bro.” You hadn’t heard Sans get up, but there he was in the doorway, his jacket draped over his shoulders like a cape. Papyrus briefly looked up from viciously stabbing the pot’s contents with a wooden spoon to glare at his brother, which only made Sans’ grin widen. “c’mon, kid, i can give you some sleeping lessons,” he said, nudging you playfully. “whaddaya say? i’m ‘snore’tainly qualified.”

“UGH!” Papyrus hurled some vegetables into the pot with a massive splash. “HOW _GOOD_ COULD YOU BE AT SLEEPING IF YOU HAVE TO DO IT _ALL THE TIME??_ ”

The two of them kept bantering and you tried not to laugh, then Papyrus finished cooking and you tried not to gag. And you had a pleasant afternoon, and the conversation drifted onto other things, and Sans left for one of his many jobs, and by the time you said your goodbyes you thought nothing of it that Papyrus chirped “SEE YOU LATER!” instead of the usual “LOOK BOTH WAYS AND BRUSH YOUR TEETH!”

You really should have known.

Once he set his mind to something, Papyrus _never_ let go.

***

You were sitting at the table, staring blankly at the clock, stalling even though you were already so tired, when the knocks came. The loud, rapid, door-splintering knocks that left no question as to who was doing the knocking. (Undyne usually just yelled.)

“OH GOOD, YOU HAVEN’T STARTED WITHOUT ME,” was all Papyrus said as he bustled past you, a stack of books in his arms. He deposited them on the tabletop, took a moment to straighten the pile, and pulled a neatly folded sheet of paper out of his shorts. (He was wearing his “battle body”, so he clearly meant business.)

You were still holding the door open, staring blankly at him. Papyrus just grinned back. “YOU MIGHT WANT TO CLOSE THAT.”

You did. It’s not like you had any better ideas.

“ALL RIGHT,” he announced, unfolding his paper with a flourish. He underlined the text with his fingertip as he read aloud. “ ‘IMPORTANT NOTE: DO NOT DRINK OR EAT ANYTHING AN HOUR BEFORE BED.’ I HAD TO...EHEM...RESEARCH SOME HORRIBLE, _HORRIBLE_ HUMAN BODY FACTS IN ORDER TO UNDERSTAND THIS, BUT REST ASSURED IT’S IMPORTANT! THAT’S WHY I WROTE IT AT THE TOP.”

Now that you’d wandered back to the table, you saw that most of his pile was self-help books about sleeping. The rest were a big medical textbook and a few “get to know your body!” picture books. Papyrus shuddered.

“WELL! ANYWAYS! HAVE YOU?”

“Have I what?”

“DRUNK OR EATEN ANYTHING IN THE PAST HOUR!” Papyrus patted your head fondly, if a bit condescendingly. “HUMANS REALLY _DO_ NEED SLEEP, DON’T THEY? IT SEEMS YOU’RE VERY SLOW ON THE UPTAKE WITHOUT IT.”

“I—well—” It was _true_ , but that didn’t mean you weren’t a little offended. “I—no, I haven’t eaten anything, or had anything to drink. I’ve mostly just been sitting here...Papyrus, what are you _doing?_ ”

The head pat came again, a little harder, and he gave a dry chuckle. “I’M GOING TO HELP YOU SLEEP,” he explained, stretching out the pauses between his words for maximum clarity. “WITH ME AT YOUR SIDE, YOU CAN’T HELP BUT SLEEP WELL!”

Okay, _that_ mental image (and every thought you could possibly associate with it) woke you right up. “Um, no, Papyrus, that’s okay,” you blurted out quickly, face already flushing. He just smiled serenely. “It’s really fine, it’s just—”

“—THAT I WOULDN’T BE MUCH OF A FRIEND IF I DIDN’T PITCH IN, I _COMPLETELY_ AGREE WITH YOU!!” Papyrus puffed out his chest and posed dramatically, and maybe you _were_ really sleep-deprived, because it looked like his cape was fluttering without any wind. “AND SINCE I AM YOUR BESTEST BEST FRIEND, I ABSOLUTELY _GUARANTEE_ THAT YOU’LL SNOOZE THROUGH THIS NIGHT WITHOUT A _SINGLE_ NIGHTMARE!”

That was it.

You paused.

You considered it.

It was a very good thought.

So you gave in, and let Papyrus take your hand and lead you to your bedroom.

“‘STEP ONE: PAJAMAS’,” he was reading off the paper. “‘PUT THEM ON.’ OKAY—!”

Before you could reconsider your decision, Papyrus had already flung open your dresser drawers and was tossing clothes left and right. Eventually he picked out the cutest, most embarrassing outfit you owned (they weren’t even pajamas), hoisting it above his head in triumph. But you stopped him just as his zeal led him to lift up the hem of your shirt.

“I can do that,” you mumbled, quiet but stern. He nodded smartly and stepped back, but never broke eye contact. You hadn’t thought it was possible, but you flushed deeper.

“I’m gonna...do this in the bathroom...”

“OH! THE ‘BATHROOM’!” Busily consulting his notes, Papyrus trailed after you as you hurried down the hall. “YOU SHOULD—YES—BRUSH YOUR TEETH, USE YOUR (EEEEEEUGH) ‘TOILET’, WASH YOUR HANDS—”

“I...I _know_ , Papyrus, I _know_ , I—”

He was following you so closely that it was hard not to just dart inside and slam the door in his face, but you resisted. So you stood there, one hand on the doorknob, listening to him jabber on and nodding when appropriate. Finally he reached the end of the bathroom section, looked up, and beamed at you.

“READY??”

You nodded, opened the bathroom door, and stepped inside. Papyrus stepped in after you and closed the door.

“Um,” you said.

He picked up your towel and slung it over his shoulder, clearly prepped to hand it to you at a moment’s notice. He was already reaching for the toilet paper roll.

“...I’d rather do this by myself.”

You had your face buried in your pajamas, eyes screwed shut. Curse your hair-trigger imagination, you couldn’t help but visualize every possible outcome to this scenario and linger on the most embarrassing.

Papyrus sounded genuinely confused. “BUT ALMOST ALL OF THE GETTING-READY-FOR-BED STEPS TAKE PLACE IN HERE! THIS IS WHERE MY ASSISTANCE WOULD BE MOST USEFUL!”

“No, um, _no_ , it really wouldn’t, I—”

There was a slight scuffing sound, of Papyrus’ boot shifting just a little against the floor. Even though you still had trouble reading some of the skeleton’s moods, something about this sound registered _instantly_ and you knew what expression he’d be wearing before you looked up.

You tried to cut him off—“I didn’t mean it like that!”—but he spoke first.

“I KNOW I’M NOT EXACTLY AN EXPERT ON HUMANS,” Papyrus said in an oddly stiff voice, his posture very careful, his face very blank, “... _YET_...BUT—”

“...that’s not what I _meant_ to...”

“—BUT I’M TRYING MY BEST, AND I TRIPLE-CHECKED ALL MY FACTS, EVEN THE DISGUSTING ONES!! SO IF YOU—”

“ _Do you let other people watch when you shower?!_ ”

The exclamation took him aback. The stiffness dropped away in favor of surprise, which was a huge relief. Papyrus blinked at you.

“IS THIS A RIDDLE?” he asked.

You were trembling— _what the hell? what kind of question is_ that _, brain?? that was really just some kind of Freudian slip,_ wasn’t _it?_ —but forced yourself to maintain eye contact. “A-answer the question. Please?”

“UM. ...NO?”

You let out a sigh. You hadn’t been 100% sure he’d give that response. “It’s the same basic principle,” you explained, more relaxed. “I’d, uh, rather not have you watching while I take care of this stuff.”

“OH...?” Suddenly something in Papyrus _snapped_ , and he glanced wildly back and forth from his list to the surrounding bathroom with bulging eyes and reddened face. “OH!! _OHHHHHHH MY GOD!!!_ I’M _SO SORRY!_ I DIDN’T—I WAS JUST _SO FOCUSED_ IT DIDN’T EVEN _OCCUR_ TO—NYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHH?!?”

In mere moments the big, self-assured monster with the dramatically fluttering cape had dissolved into a mortified, blubbering mess, hiding his face in his hands and shaking his head, blushing and stammering all the time. The last of the tension dissolved and you let out a genuine smile. He was just too adorable.

Finally Papyrus straightened up and coughed a little. His face was still bright red. “WELL THEN,” he said matter-of-factly, folding the list back up. “I’LL ALLOW YOU TO TAKE CARE OF THIS PORTION BY YOURSELF. I’M SURE YOU’LL DO A GREAT JOB!! I’LL JUST BE WAITING IN YOUR ROOM TO FINISH—UHHHHH—” He jumped slightly as if he’d been shocked, and fixed an uncharacteristically sheepish gaze on you. “...THAT IS...IF YOU DON’T MIND...? BECAUSE IF YOU DO, THEN OF COURSE I’LL—”

You shook your head vigorously. “No, no, I don’t mind! Uh. Unless...unless you have something better to do, I mean, I don’t want to keep you—”

“NOT AT ALL! I WANT TO HELP YOU SLEEP!!”

“Are you sure? If you’d rather go home...”

“SANS DOESN’T _NEED_ MY HELP TO SLEEP.”

That came out so acridly that you burst out laughing.

***

You took maybe a little longer than you needed to, partly because your mind kept drifting off to those “with me at your side, you can’t help but sleep well” sorts of mental images that made you too embarrassed to face your ridiculously cute friend again. By the time you shuffled back to your room (wearing your “pajamas”), Papyrus was sliding one of your dresser drawers shut. The clothes he’d scattered on the floor earlier had vanished.

“THEY’RE SORTED BY COLOR NOW,” he announced brightly.

Well, you could live with that.

You started towards the bed, expecting to slide under the covers next, but Papyrus’ list said otherwise. He flipped the paper over to a diagram he’d scribbled on the back and began demonstrating stretches for you, counting out the seconds that each pose had to be held for. His routine seemed to be a combination of several books’ advice and was probably more rigorous than absolutely necessary, but you had to admit, it was draining in a pretty good way.

Papyrus spotted you wobbling when you got out of the last pose and instantly swept you into his arms, carrying you to the bed and tucking you in. Then he turned to face the door, and you were just starting to feel disappointed by his leaving when instead he pulled a chair up next to the bed and sat down.

“I’VE BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS LAST STEP,” he confessed giddily, picking his stack of books off the floor and placing it in his lap. He removed a slim volume you hadn’t noticed before. It had a pink cover, faded from years of use, with a white fleece cutout in the shape of a rabbit.

He began to read.

Given a choice of bedtime story, _Peek-A-Boo With Fluffy Bunny_ would not have even made it onto your top ten list. It was a very simple book, meant for very young readers, with the conceit that the person being read to would cover their eyes and actually play peek-a-boo with the title character. But Papyrus was so into it, reading the lines with such emotion, dramatically pantomiming the peek-a-boos and encouraging you to do the same...there wasn’t even a question of feeling self-conscious or annoyed. You enjoyed it wholeheartedly because _he_ enjoyed it wholeheartedly.

His enthusiasm was infectious. It always had been. And because he was enthusiastic about everything, you couldn’t help but be enthusiastic about him.

You were both giggling and clapping and cheering and “awww”ing when Papyrus turned the last page, and this after rereading his favorite parts several times. He finished the story, kicking his feet with excitement, and you were so busy wiping your streaming eyes that it took you a moment to realize that Papyrus was staring at you.

“YOU DON’T LOOK VERY SLEEPY,” he observed.

You shook your head, still chuckling. “I don’t _feel_ very sleepy.”

“THEN...” His shoulders slumped, and he clutched the book to his chest protectively. “THEN...I’VE _FAILED??_ ”

“What? Oh—oh, no, no, it’s fine!” You sat up hurriedly to reassure him, but that was clearly the wrong move, as Papyrus frantically pushed you back down and re-tucked the sheets around you. “It’s just—”

“I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN _FLUFFY BUNNY_ WOULD BE TOO STIMULATING! IT’S SUCH A PAGE-TURNER!!”

“ _Listen!_ ”

He’d tucked you in very tight, but you managed to free one hand and grab his bony wrist.

“ _Thank you_ ,” you said firmly, but with a wide, affectionate smile. “I’m really glad you came over tonight. It’s been a lot of fun, and I’m _sure_ I’ll have good dreams. You can go home now if you want to.”

Papyrus swayed a little in your grasp, lost in thought.

“...BUT...I DON’T _HAVE_ TO GO HOME IF I _DON’T_ WANT TO?”

The question took you by surprise, you have no idea whether or not you answered. But after a moment he eased himself out of your grip, walked toward the door...closed the door, turned off the light, and quietly tip-toed back to his seat.

You couldn’t tell in the darkness, but you were sure he was watching you.

After an eternity—or, more likely, a few seconds—gloved fingertips brushed against your forehead. They wavered in the air above you for a moment, unsure of what to do, then gently settled down and began to stroke your hair.

A low hum broke the silence. You didn’t recognize the tune, but it felt like a lullaby, warm and safe.

You let your eyes drift shut.

***

_Though he hadn’t hummed this tune in years, it came so easily to Papyrus that it didn’t require his concentration. He saved that for the rhythm of his fingers and listening to the sounds of your breathing. He noticed when it slowed, when the breaths came long and deep and far apart, and withdrew his hand slowly so as not to startle you._

_Rising carefully from his chair, Papyrus bent over and softly tapped his teeth against your forehead, whispering a small “mwah”, the best he could do for a kiss. Whether his kiss was scaring the nightmares away, purifying them into good dreams, or carrying good dreams into your brain...the exact scenario didn’t matter. He’d come up with every possible explanation and found them all satisfying._

_With monster eyes attuned to the darkness, he saw your lips curl in a smile. He smiled back, resisting the urge to kiss you again. After all, there_ was _that saying about “too much of a good thing”. He was probably pushing it already by gracing you with his presence for so long._

_Settling back into his chair, Papyrus closed his eyes and began to hum again, letting the melody fill the room._

***

Your journey back to consciousness was slow and meandering, filled with half-dreams and unidentifiable noises. There was no sweat, no gasp for breath, no aching jaw from clenched teeth. Just the eventual awareness that not only were you awake, you’d been awake for some time.

That tune Papyrus had hummed was still twirling through your head.

Straining against the tightly-tucked covers, you turned to face the chair, but it was empty. Even the books had disappeared.

You sighed.

...A gentle _bump_ echoed down the hallway.

A soft noise that could have been anything, but it pulled you out of bed and sent you pounding out the door. You saw him straighten up from where he’d been crouching, cleaning your kitchen table with a sponge.

“DID IT WORK?” he asked just as you threw your arms around him.

“Yes,” you mumbled into his shirt, squeezing as tight as you could. Papyrus hugged you affectionately back (fortunately putting the sponge down first). “ _So_ well. Thank you.”

“NYEH HEH! I _KNEW_ IT!!” His voice was so loud so close to your ear, but you giggled rather than winced. “TOGETHER, WE CAN DO _ANYTHING!!_ ”

He gently grabbed your shoulders and pushed you back, holding you at arm’s length. “I’LL MAKE US AN AMAZING BREAKFAST TO CELEBRATE! FRIEND, WHERE ARE YOUR SPAGHETTI INGREDIENTS??”

“Oh no you don’t,” you laughed, kissing his cheek in your excitement. You weren’t even thinking of avoiding his cooking, sincerely meaning every word you said. “You’ve done enough already, now it’s my turn. I’m buying breakfast. Where do you wanna go?”

Papyrus seemed momentarily frozen, but as the blush faded from his cheek his familiar smile returned. “THE SPAGHETTI FACTORY?”

Of course. “Let me get my wallet.”

In moments the two of you were hand-in-hand, heading for the door. But when you opened it, you were shocked to see Sans on the landing, his fist raised to knock.

“GOOD MORNING, BROTHER!”

Papyrus was completely unflappable, but your mouth had gone dry. Sans was infinitely harder to read than Papyrus, and for all intents and purposes he looked just as calm and casual as always, but there was something...something _sharp_ about him.

“’sup?”

You tore your hand from Papyrus’ grip and blurted out “This isn’t what it looks like!” at the same moment Papyrus cheerfully exclaimed “THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!”

“We didn’t do anything!”

“WE’VE SOLVED THE SLEEPING PROBLEM!”

The glowing pinpricks of Sans’ pupils were flitting between the two of you, his unsettling smile taut across his face.

“All he _really_ did was read me a bedtime story and wait for me to fall asleep,” you whispered pleadingly as Papyrus loudly rattled off the list of successful bedtime preparation steps you’d taken. You weren’t sure if Sans heard you, but whatever the cause, the sharpness disappeared from his demeanor and the small skeleton slumped into genuine relaxation.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE, BROTHER?” Papyrus’ eyesockets narrowed. “NOTHING PRODUCTIVE, I SUPPOSE?”

“oh, since you didn’t come home, i just wanted to know what you’d been doing all night,” he said coolly. Then his smile widened. “i’m glad both of you explained it to me. i really appreciate hearing both ‘virgins’ of the events.”

You choked, startled, and Sans’ grin got even wider. “guess i didn’t have to ‘penetrate’ far to get the truth. you two are hardly ‘impregnable’ sources of information.”

“ _SANS!_ ” Papyrus barked, stomping his foot. “I CAN TELL YOU’RE PUNNING! STOP UPSETTING THE HUMAN WITH STRANGELY INCOMPREHENSIBLE JOKES!”

Sans sighed overdramatically, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “don’t worry, i know this isn’t a laughing matter. just...invite me along next time, would’ya?” He paused just long enough to create suspense. “that way, it’s bound to be a ‘sex’cess.”

“ _SANS!!_ I ALREADY TOLD YOU, IT _WAS_ A SUCCESS. OUR FRIEND SLEPT EXCELLENTLY! ...FRIEND, WHAT’S THE MATTER? ARE YOU OVERHEATING??”

You slipped off the jacket you’d only just put on (grateful for the excuse) and tried to glare at Sans, though you were sure it only came off as a mortified pout. He chuckled noiselessly back.

“WELL, IF YOU’RE STILL KEEPING TRACK OF MY MOVEMENTS, BROTHER, WE ARE ABOUT TO GO TO THE SPAGHETTI FACTORY TO CELEBRATE THIS BEDTIME VICTORY. IF YOU NEED TO REACH M—”

“sounds great. i’m in.”

“WHAT!! YOU HAD NO PART IN THIS! WHY SHOULD YOU CELEBRATE WITH US??”

“hey. _i_ did some successful sleeping too. all day, in fact.”

“THAT’S JUST LAZINESS! THERE’S NO CELEBRATION FOR LAZINESS!!”

“It’s okay, let him come.” The door had been closed and locked a few sentences back, and the three of you were already strolling off in the right direction anyways. “He can be...senior sleep consultant?”

Sans winked. “if we went to the mexican place, i could be the ‘señor’ sleep consult—”

“ _SAAAAAAANS!_ ”

“whoops! i’ll go on ahead. meet ya there.”

Sans meandered off in the opposite direction of the restaurant and disappeared around a corner. Papyrus let out an exasperated sigh.

“He was just worried,” you said consolingly.

“WHAT’S THERE TO BE WORRIED ABOUT? THAT YOU MIGHT... _OH_.” He sounded crestfallen, and for a moment you thought he’d figured it out, but—“WELL, _I_ WAS WORRIED THAT YOU MIGHT STILL BE PLAGUED BY NIGHTMARES TOO, SO I SUPPOSE IT’S ONLY NATURAL. BUT!! HE SHOULD HAVE HAD MORE FAITH IN ME!!! AND IT ALL WORKED OUT!”

It sure had.

A wonderful evening, a great night’s sleep for the first time in far too long, and now breakfast with your two favorite skeletons...!

“SO. SAME TIME TONIGHT?”

“I’d be delighted.”


	2. Alternate Ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Papyrus was standing in the hallway when you finally emerged from the bathroom, tapping his foot anxiously. But he brightened considerably when he saw you.

“NYEH-HEH! HAS THE BATHROOM PORTION BEEN COMPLETED?”

“Oh, uh, yes.”

He sucked in a deep breath and stepped forward.

“THIS NEXT PART...THIS WASN’T IN ANY OF THE BOOKS I READ, BUT I SAW IT ON HUMAN TELEVISION LAST WEEK, SO I’M SURE IT’S COMPLETELY FACTUAL!”

As he spoke, he’d _continued_ stepping forward, to the point where you’d instinctively started stepping back...and now you were pressed up against the bathroom door with Papyrus looming just inches away. Usually he was better about personal space than this.

He stared at you for a long moment, rubbing his jaw, before he finally spoke.

“BUT...JUST TO BE SURE...DO HUMANS DO GOODNIGHT KISSES?”

Your face flushed bright red and you made up your mind to say no, only to find yourself already nodding. Papyrus let out a sigh of relief.

“EXCELLENT!!” he said, took hold of your cheeks, and firmly mashed his mouth against yours.

He held it there for a long time, passionately nuzzling your lips and letting out a long, deep hum that sounded an _awful_ lot like a noise of pleasure until he broke the kiss and the noise trailed from an “MMMMMM” into a very loud, deliberate “MWAH”.

Your head was spinning and you thought your legs were going to collapse under you, so it was an equally great and awful thing that Papyrus then placed his hands under your thighs and forcefully lifted you off the ground. Yelping, you flung your arms around his neck to steady yourself.

“THIS CUSTOM IS SO ADORABLE!” Papyrus was gushing into your shoulder, securing his grip around you. He was holding you up like a toddler—or, probably more accurate to his point of reference, like someone who was being elaborately made out with. You let out a tiny squeak. “HUMANS EXCHANGING KISSES AND CARRYING EACH OTHER TO BED! AND _WE_ WERE BROUGHT UP TO BELIEVE THAT HUMANS _WEREN’T_ KIND.”

Sure enough, he’d started down the hall to the bedroom with not a care in the world. Half-panicked, half-excited, you started to wonder exactly _what_ he’d been watching...

He sidled through the doorway with a little difficulty, pulling the door shut behind him. The darkness was absolute, but Papyrus never missed a step as he strode to the bed—must be those monster eyes used to low lighting. He pressed another enthusiastic “MWAH” to your cheek before easing you onto the bed, pulling the covers up over you and fluffing your pillow.

Then he gently positioned you on your side, lifted the covers, and slid into bed behind you.

The pounding of your heart was deafening in your ears as you felt the blankets shift around you. Then two successive _thunk_ s as his boots were dropped on the floor...then the buckling of the mattress as he scooted closer to you...then the oddly warm tingle of his arms slowly wrapping around your waist, his body pressing against your back, and his bony chin coming to rest by your ear.

You’d never really noticed before whether or not Papyrus breathed, but there was no doubt about it now. The skin on your neck tingled every time he exhaled.

“ _ON TELEVISION_ ,” he was whispering, but of course with him a “whisper” was the volume of another person’s speaking voice, “ _THE MAIN HUMAN MET ANOTHER HUMAN IN SOME KIND OF BEVERAGES-ONLY RESTAURANT. AND DESPITE KNOWING EACH OTHER SO BRIEFLY, THEY EXCHANGED THE RITUAL GOOD NIGHT KISS AND AWOKE THE NEXT MORNING HUGGING IN THE MAIN HUMAN’S BED! I WAS SO TOUCHED THAT THEY’D FORMED SUCH A STRONG FRIENDSHIP SO QUICKLY! THEY MUST HAVE CUDDLED ALL NIGHT!!_ ”

“Bet that’s not _all_ they did.”

You hadn’t meant to say it aloud, but there it was. Papyrus lifted his head, and you were too nervous to turn and look, but you were sure he was gazing down at you curiously.

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN?”

“U-um. I...”

“DID I MISS SOMETHING? IS MY SURE-FIRE-GOOD-BEDTIME LIST INCOMPLETE??”

“Ah, no, I, it’s all right...”

“NO! NO, IT’S _NOT_ ALL RIGHT!” Papyrus firmly tightened his hug, making you gasp. “PLEASE, IF THERE’S ANYTHING I CAN DO TO MAKE YOUR BEDTIME MORE PLEASANT, I WILL!! I ABSOLUTELY _WILL!!!_ ”

That.

Was certainly a loaded statement.

One of Papyrus’ hands left your hip to cup your face, gently turning it towards his. In the darkness, it was only the very, _very_ close proximity that made his pleading expression visible.

“It’s...” you mumbled, unconsciously licking your lips. “It’s just that...”

“YES?” he prompted.

It was too much. You gave in.

“Those, um, humans on TV. They...they probably...they probably did a l-lot more goodnight kisses before they went to sleep.”

Papyrus was silent for a moment.

You were just getting ready to fake a laugh and pretend you’d been joking when he suddenly pulled away from you, placed both his palms on your shoulders and pushed you onto your back. Then, up on his hands and knees, the blankets draping over him like a tent, Papyrus positioned himself on top of you.

His arms were around you again, but encircling your back this time, pressing your chest against his.

His mouth met yours again.

You melted into him instantly, letting out a low sigh. It wasn’t until the second or third kiss that you thought to embrace him back, but when you did you held on tight.

Had Papyrus researched this, too? Or had he done this before? Or was this just some kind of instinct? Whatever it was, it worked beautifully—the lack of lip muscles to pucker against you was practically negated by the subtle twists of his head that gently pushed and pulled on your own lips, slightly opening and closing his jaws against you, varying the pauses between kisses to create just the right balance of anticipation and surprise. His thumbs traced the edges of your shoulderblades in a way that made you shiver beneath him.

Overall Papyrus was slow and gentle, but you couldn’t help it, the more you got the more you wanted and the more fervently you pressed against him. He had to move more quickly and roughly in order to keep up with you, bony fingertips digging into your shirt and teeth narrowly missing slicing into your lower lip. You had your legs wrapped around his hips now, needily smearing your mouth along his jawline before peppering wet, rapid-fire kisses across the entire left side of his face.

In a flash of movement you were left sucking on air as Papyrus’ head went to your chest, holding you firmly in place with both hands on your back. His profile was flush against your sternum, oddly still, oddly silent, even as you craned your neck to plant more kisses on his forehead.

Then Papyrus sat up again, looming over you, gazing down. You instantly moved to put your lips to his mouth, but what little you could see of his expression startled you out of it.

“YOUR HEART IS BEATING VERY FAST,” he said sternly, tapping your chest with his index finger. “YOU’RE GETTING THE _OPPOSITE_ OF SLEEPY, _AREN’T_ YOU?”

“Uh.”

Papyrus tilted his head to the side, and there was a brief flash of light in his eye sockets—a glare? a twinkle? It was too quick to tell.

“THIS ISN’T BEDTIME PREPARATION. YOU JUST WANTED TO KISS ME.”

“...uh.”

The quiet was deafening. You were too scared to breathe, waiting for what he’d say next, but after an agonizingly long time it was clear that he wasn’t going to say anything.

“I’m sorry, I’m _sorry_ ,” you moaned, burying your face in your hands. “I don’t know what I was thinking, I—I must not have _been_ thinking. I should never have...”

As you went on blubbering, Papyrus’ palm met your forehead and lingered there. When you trailed off into silence, he patted you firmly, though _very_ condescendingly.

“SO. HAVE YOU LEARNED YOUR LESSON ABOUT DECEPTION?”

You nodded, abashed.

“NAUGHTY HUMAN.” Papyrus ended the patting by making a fist and giving you a gentle bonk. Then he let out an exaggerated sigh. “IF YOU WANTED ME TO KISS YOU, YOU SHOULD HAVE JUST _ASKED_.”

Your head snapped up to stare at him in shock, but it was too late—his hand was on your cheek again and his mouth was pressing another long, purposeful “MWAH” to your lips. Then he was getting out of bed, firmly pushing you onto your back, and tucking the sheets in around you.

“...Wuh?” you finally managed.

He was already halfway to the door, boots under his arm. “WELL, I CAN’T STAY IN YOUR BEDROOM NOW THAT WE’RE DATING, CAN I? THAT WOULD HARDLY BE PROPER!”

“D- _dating?_ ”

“BUT DON’T WORRY!! I’LL BE OUTSIDE STANDING GUARD AGAINST NIGHTMARES. I HAVEN’T FORGOTTEN MY MISSION IN OUR FRANTIC MOMENT OF PASSION.”

“ _Dating?_ ”

“GOOD NIGHT, SWEET HUMAN. AND REMEMBER, HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY!”

There was a click as the door shut. You hadn’t even realized he’d opened it.

All in all, it wasn’t a very good attempt at better sleeping. Your head was spinning and your heart was pounding for nearly two hours before you finally managed to calm down enough to drift off.

But dang if you didn’t have _great_ dreams.


	3. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since a lot of the comments mentioned Sans, and I'd been wanting to do some kind of skelebro-polyamory-thing for a while, I kept thinking about that "invite me along next time" line and...I guess here's an epilogue?? I've got a couple other plot bunnies for possible continuations that I may or may not write, so I'm going to leave the total number of chapters marked as "?" for now.
> 
> This continues off the platonic-ish/"original" story ending and not the romantic alternate one (sorry :P ), and once again it can be read as platonic or romantic but there's some romantic teasing involved. I couldn't avoid using pronouns for the reader since the reader is mentioned in dialogue, so if you don't personally use "they/them", you can change that using a browser extension or something, or just pretend that monster courtesy involves addressing everyone as "they/them" unless otherwise specified and that "you" never specified otherwise.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

“That stuff you said this morning,” you whispered urgently as you closed the door behind Sans. “You were just joking...right?”

He winked. “would _i_ do that?”

Papyrus was loudly unpacking his MTT-brand tote bag behind you, so you had a few moments to wrestle down your nervous blush before he could notice it.

You hadn’t totally expected Papyrus to show up again tonight—though, of course, he was _Papyrus_ , and he’d _said_ he would, so there shouldn’t have been any question. But Sans strolling in behind him was what had _really_ knocked you for a loop. That “invite me along next time” bit had sounded like a setup for his next pun, not an expression of interest. Was he really _that_ worried about you possibly taking his brother to the bone zone?

Or, you realized with a fresh burst of shame, he might actually be worried _for_ you, with your poor sleep and nightmares. His relentless teasing made it easy to forget how genuinely kind he could be. You hated yourself for suspecting him.

“DO YOU NEED HELP LOCKING THE DOOR, FRIEND?”

You jumped, suddenly aware of how long you’d been standing there. “S-sorry, just lost in thought,” you stammered, quickly setting the lock and whirling around. So much for not facing Papyrus with a blush.

The tall skeleton clapped excitedly. “AH, THAT’S GOOD!! THAT’S THE FIRST STEP TOWARDS DREAMLAND! BUT DON’T HURRY TOO FAR AHEAD, OR YOU’LL BE MISSING OUT ON VITAL SLEEP AID!!”

You approached the table curiously, glancing over the unpacked contents of Papyrus’ Mettaton-shaped bag. The self-help and anatomy books of last night were gone except for a few volumes that Papyrus must have deemed important. _Fluffy Bunny_ was balanced on top of them. There was also Papyrus’ list with lots of scribbled margin notes and crossed-out sections, another sheet of paper on which he’d rewritten the list more neatly, a folded fleece blanket with a skateboard pattern, a black sleep mask painted to look like sunglasses, a very old and _very_ worn stuffed animal of unknown species, a pot from the skelebros’ kitchen, and a carton of milk that Papyrus was already pouring into it.

“SINCE LAST NIGHT YOUR COMBINED BEDTIME PREPARATION TOOK ABOUT FIFTY-THREE MINUTES,” he was explaining, carrying the pot to the stove (he’d poured in the _entire_ carton), “I THOUGHT WE COULD TRY INCORPORATING ANOTHER STEP I’D READ ABOUT WITHOUT VIOLATING THE NO-CONSUMING-FOR-AN-HOUR-BEFORE-BED RULE! WARM MILK!! IT’S SUPPOSED TO BE RELAXING.”

“for the human or the milk?”

“FOR THE—? OH! I NEVER THOUGHT OF IT THAT WAY!!”

Sans shook his head and grinned while Papyrus rushed off to check his books for the answer. He was wearing his “hangout clothes” instead of his “battle body” tonight—you weren’t sure whether that was a good sign or a bad sign. Sans, of course, had on the same outfit he always wore. You found yourself wondering if it really _was_ the same outfit. Did he even _have_ any other clothes? Did he wash them?

Based on Papyrus’ cooking methods, you were sure he’d intended to let the milk boil over and scrape the gummy remains off the bottom of the pot for your eating pleasure. But when the two of you finished overanalyzing the passage he was quoting (“THIS PHRASING CLEARLY IMPLIES THAT THE MILK IS SENTIENT!”), long after you should’ve heard it bubble...you turned around and not only was the stove off, the steaming milk had been poured into your favorite mug and the rest had gone back in the carton. Papyrus began complaining that it hadn’t gotten warm enough—to you, though, it tasted _just right_ —and insisted that this situation proved that the milk was alive and making its own decisions, so therefore, maybe it _was_ relaxing.

Sans was the only one who could have done it, but he’d been in your line of sight the whole time and hadn’t moved besides twitching a few fingers. But something in his smile seemed triumphant, and maybe it wasn’t unfair to read into his pun about “‘milking’ the opportunity”, so when you said “Thank you” you sincerely meant it for both of them.

***

Papyrus picked out your outfit again, and it still wasn’t actually pajamas but at least they were comfortable. Sans was gently dozing off in Papyrus’ reading chair (you hadn’t gotten around to moving it back) and Papyrus was tucking the skateboard blanket under your sheets when you excused yourself to the bathroom.

When you got back, Papyrus was in position to start the stretching and you took your place beside him. It was strange how this had already started to feel like routine. You got through a few cycles of stretches with ease before Papyrus started calling for Sans to join in, prompting the little skeleton to halfheartedly hold out a hand or a foot without otherwise moving from the chair. By the end of it Papyrus had bodily lifted Sans out of his seat and was forcibly posing him like a ragdoll, and you actually had to sit on the floor to avoid collapsing from laughter.

Even with that delay you finished bedtime prep much more quickly than last time (probably because you hadn’t been stalling in the bathroom out of embarrassment tonight). Papyrus insisted you go to the bathroom again to help fill out the hour since you’d had the warm milk. It was a good suggestion, though you were more in danger of peeing yourself over their ridiculous antics than your evening nightcap.

“HAVE YOU FINISHED RELAXING THE MILK?” Papyrus asked awkwardly when you returned. He and Sans were standing on either side of your bed, Sans with his hands in his pockets but Papyrus with a firm grip on the sheets, ready to lift them up for you. You approached the bed from that side to oblige him.

“Uh, yeah, I...I think it’s as relaxed as it’ll be,” you fumbled as you slid past him into bed. Papyrus began fussing over you again, tucking in the sheets, smoothing down your hair, punching up the pillow beneath your head. The fleece blanket he’d brought was soft and warm, and the as-yet-unidentified stuffed animal placed carefully beside your face felt strangely comforting. You should really tell these boys more often what incredible friends they were.

“AND YOU? ARE YOU RELAXED?”

Before you could answer you felt the sheets lift on your other side and the mattress creak under a substantial weight.

“yeah, bro, i’m totally relaxed. thanks for asking.”

Every muscle in your body tensed.

“ _SANS!_ ” Papyrus snapped, as shocked as he was outraged. “GET OUT OF THAT BED!!”

“why, bro? it’s bedtime. that’s the whole point, isn’t it?”

“YES, BUT—” He faltered for a moment before finding his ground. “BUT NOT FOR _YOU!!_ IF ANYTHING, YOU SHOULD BE SLEEPING _LESS!!!_ ”

“but ‘less is more’, right? so if i slept _less_ , i’d actually be being _more_ lazy.”

Sans cut off his brother’s sputtered response by shifting slightly under the sheets, and dammit, you were _sure_ he was brushing his elbow against you on _purpose_.

“besides,” he said quietly, turning his head to grin at you, warm breath whistling against your face, “our friend _wants_ to ‘sleep with us’...right?”

Silence.

Dead silence.

You didn’t even have the guts to whimper.

“IS THIS TRUE?” Papyrus finally asked, leaning over to look at you, but you buried your flaming face in your palms to avoid him. “HAVE YOU BEEN REPRESSING SUCH A DESIRE ALL THIS TIME?? IS THAT THE REASON FOR THE CONSTANT FACE-BLUSHING?”

“probably,” Sans answered for you. Whatever the hell was happening, you’d almost rather be stuck in one of your nightmares. “bet you didn’t think your expression would be so easily ‘red’.”

“UGH, _SANS!!_ STOP PUNISHING THEM, THEY HAVEN’T DONE ANYTHING WRONG!”

“...‘pun’ishing...?”

“AAAAAHH!!! NO, I DIDN’T MEAN IT!!”

As the banter had worn on, you’d been slowly sinking under the covers in a futile attempt to disappear. But then the covers were suddenly thrown back, exposing you, and Papyrus grabbed you under both arms and hauled you back up until your head was returned to the pillow.

“I’M SORRY I’VE BEEN NEGLECTING YOU, FRIEND,” he said with a truly mournful expression, unaware that this statement had the least basis in fact of anything he’d uttered tonight ( _counting_ the “sentient milk” rant). “WERE YOU TOO AFRAID TO ASK US TO SLEEP WITH YOU?”

It was kinda-sorta-almost true, which is why you started nodding before you realized what a bad response this was.

“OH!! YOU MUST HAVE BEEN ASHAMED THAT YOUR BED WAS SO SMALL.”

“Ah, n-no, actually—!”

“BUT DON’T WORRY. IT SEEMS IT’S JUST THE RIGHT SIZE FOR YOU AND SANS, SO YOU CAN SNOOZE TOGETHER PEACEFULLY ALL NIGHT!!”

“No—” you gasped, sitting up. Spending all night next to this inscrutable, teasing, actually-pretty-cute-but-this-wasn’t-the-time-to-think-about-that—! “No, no no, you can’t, I don’t want—”

Sans’ elbow nudged against your side again, shocking you into silence. He shook his head disappointedly. “wow, bro. that’s ‘cold’. even for a snowdin guy.”

Papyrus tensed instantly. “WHAT? _WHAT??_ ”

“can’t you see they want to ‘sleep with’ _you_ the most?”

“Oh my god, shut up shut up shut _up_ ,” you moaned, but the sound was barely audible.

Papyrus’ intense, surprised gaze was flitting between the two of you as Sans continued. “you’re the one they invited over to help ‘em sleep,” he drawled (it wasn’t exactly true, but the way Papyrus was nodding that may’ve been how it’d played out in his mind). “you’re the one they spend the most time with. they’re always really happy to see you. you might even be their best friend. of course if they wanted to ‘sleep with’ anybody, it’d be you.”

...oh. Was this...?

“IS THIS TRU—” Papyrus started just as you blurted out “ _I’m so sorry!_ Sans, I—you’re my best friend too, I’m sorry if I’ve acted like I—I like you both so much, I’d love to sleep with _both_ of—”

The slightly despondent Sans expression that had sparked your apology instantly switched to a mischievous grin. You clapped both hands over your mouth.

“WOWIE!! I HAD NO IDEA YOU FELT THAT WAY!”

“I d-didn’t mean—”

“IT MAY BE A TIGHT SQUEEZE...AND I MAY NOT _SLEEP_ VERY MUCH, IS THAT PART IMPORTANT? BUT I’LL CERTAINLY LAY HERE ALL NIGHT IF IT MAKES YOU HAPPY!!”

Beet red, you protested the whole time he was sliding off his shoes, but of course he was sure you were just being polite. And then he was sliding into bed beside you, and if you thought it was a tight squeeze _then_ , it only got tighter when he tucked the sheets in.

You and Sans were shoulder-to-shoulder, both on your backs, Sans just an inch away from falling off the bed. His hands were clasped over his stomach, and between that and his closed eyes and serene smile you really could have thought he was a corpse. Papyrus was on his side in an effort to take up less space, one arm draped across the pillow so that if you turned your head you’d find your face in his armpit.

Your bed was now host to a human sandwich with skeleton bread.

“SO,” Papyrus chirped. “WHO WANTS TO READ _FLUFFY BUNNY_?”

You tried to volunteer just to keep your mind off of... _everything_ , but Papyrus was having none of it, insisting that you were the one who had to be read _to_. You were surprised when Sans offered, since you’d thought he was already asleep. Then there was a hilarious misadventure of bumping-intos and falling-ontos as Papyrus squirmed to try to reach the book (which was on the reading chair) without getting out of the bed. You were pretty sure Sans could have helped the same way he’d helped with the milk earlier, so the fact that he _didn’t_ spoke volumes about how funny he thought this must be. Or how lazy he was. Or maybe you’d been mistaken about the milk somehow (could it really have just poured itself...?) and nothing that was happening spoke volumes about anything about Sans at all.

Eventually _Peek-A-Boo With Fluffy Bunny_ was retrieved and passed down to Sans, who didn’t bother to sit up or even open the book. He just kept his eyes shut and started mumbling the text from memory. Papyrus protested, which got you a faceful of humerus as he reached across you to snatch the book back. He propped himself up on his arm beside you and held the book open at the appropriate pages so you could clearly see the illustrations. Following along with the “peek-a-boos” was once again strongly encouraged, and particular voices were requested from Sans, and several parts were reread, though this time it was because of Sans (deliberately? probably...?) reciting the wrong words and having to be loudly corrected. As with everything involving these two, it was equal parts adorable and exasperating.

By the end of it Sans was snoring loudly, and after much heckling Papyrus was forced to give up and just read the last line aloud himself. He twisted to place the book back on the chair, which sent the crest of his hip digging into your thigh. You weren’t sure if he could feel it. Skeleton bodies were weird.

“LIGHTS OUT!” Papyrus announced, still a little irritable, and to your immense relief he lifted the sheets to slip out of the bed.

“hang on, bro.”

...Of course. He’d fooled you again. Which begged the question, all those times Papyrus accused Sans of being asleep, was he ever actually sleeping??

“you don’t need to get up. haven’t you seen human tv? up here, you can turn the lights off just by clapping.”

“REALLY??” Papyrus flopped back down onto the bed, which was a far cry from the temporary relief your cramped body might’ve had if he’d gotten up but at least it was better than the awkward crunch of the half-seated position he’d held a moment ago. “I’D JUST ASSUMED THOSE WERE SPECIAL EFFECTS!”

“Actually—”

“nah, bro, it’s real. see for yourself.”

Oh, ha ha, Sans, very funny, make your brother applaud and then laugh when nothing happens. You tried to explain but were silenced again by Sans’ elbow in your side, and by then Papyrus had already done the perfect “clap off” double-clap (As Seen On TV).

The lights went out.

You stared at Sans. A tiny spark of blue was fading out of one eyesocket, with a matching one fizzing out near the lightswitch across the room.

“HUMAN TECHNOLOGY IS _AMAZING!_ ” gushed Papyrus, wiggling back under the sheets. “EVEN BETTER THAN MAGIC!”

You kept staring at Sans. He didn’t bother turning his head, just letting his tiny pupils(??) flicker towards you.

“g’night,” was all he said, and he firmly _patted your thigh_ before bringing his hands back to his stomach, closing his eyes and snoring again.

“GOODNIGHT, BROTHER!” Papyrus boomed before covering his mouth and continuing in an almost-whisper. “ _GOOD NIGHT, FRIEND._ ”

...Well then. This was actually happening.

Apart from the gentle rising and falling of his chest, Sans was as still as the grave (heh), though just being squeezed so close to him was uncomfortable enough. Papyrus was clearly trying hard not to move, but he was naturally fidgety and every little jostle of his limbs rubbed against you. You had no idea what to do with your hands, so you just wound up with a death grip on the stuffed animal.

Papyrus’ thumb tickled your forehead as he began stroking your hair like he had last night—though clumsier, due to the cramped conditions. You gulped embarrassingly loud.

“ _PLEASE FORGIVE ME IF I’M NERVOUS_ ,” Papyrus murmured directly into your ear. “ _I’VE NEVER SLEPT WITH A FRIEND BEFORE. NOT EVEN WITH UNDYNE. AND I HAVEN’T SLEPT WITH SANS IN MANY YEARS._ ”

You would’ve enjoyed Sans’ convulsive shudder at that sentence ( _you can dish it out, but you can’t take it, huh?_ ) if you hadn’t had to shudder yourself. “It’s okay,” you whispered.

“ _HAVE YOU? SLEPT WITH ANYONE?_ ”

You got the feeling that Sans was also awaiting your response. But it was probably your imagination.

“I am right now,” was what you decided to say.

“ _NYEH HEH! TRUE, TRUE._ ”

He began to hum, but it was a different tune from last time, and maybe your imagination _was_ acting up because Sans’ snores were starting to sound like harmonies. Slowly, the elbow against your side and the kneecap against your shin began to feel less like pain and more like comfort. You were still a human sandwich, but coddled and warm and safe between those slices of skeleton bread.

Just before the last remnants of your consciousness melted away, you could swear you felt a bony kiss on each cheek.

***

You awoke feeling hot and heavy. Okay, not _like that_ (but you wouldn’t be surprised if you’d had dreams _like that_ )—literally feeling very hot, and under a heavy weight.

The hot part was easy to figure out. The skateboard blanket, while comfortable, was definitely too much when combined with your other sheets and the temperature of the room. Not to mention the unusual heat radiating from those big lumps providing the “heavy” part. The logical identity of which came back to you in a snap once you realized that the fingers gently stroking your side weren’t yours.

Any unspoken agreement to respect personal space had clearly been broken overnight. Your head was nestled protectively under Papyrus’ chin while his arms encircled you, gently pressing you (and the captive stuffed animal) against his chest as those fingers trailed slowly up and down your ribcage. Sans’ face was buried in your shoulder, and while his hands were in his jacket pockets his legs were firmly wrapped around your thigh.

“ _GOOD MORNING!_ ” Papyrus hissed gleefully in response to your muffled yelp. You turned to look at him, which was a mistake, because the morning sun lit the room enough for you to be painfully aware of how absolutely little space there was between your faces. “ _I’M GLAD TO HEAR YOU SLEPT WELL!_ ”

“Huh?”

“ _THAT IS, YOU DIDN’T MAKE ANY NIGHTMARE NOISES. YOUR BREATHING WAS VERY REGULAR AND CALM ALL NIGHT! YOU DIDN’T HAVE ANY NIGHTMARES, DID YOU?_ ”

You shook your head, which accidentally meant you nose-nuzzled him. Papyrus giggled, and it was such a cute sound you couldn’t help it, you chuckled along.

“ _WELL, THIS TIME_ I’M _MAKING BREAKFAST FOR_ SURE,” he was whispering, clumsily trying to disentangle himself from you. “ _I WANTED TO WAIT UNTIL YOU AWOKE SO MY DEPARTURE WOULDN’T DISTURB YOU. ...NO, NO, DON’T WORRY ABOUT_ HIM.” You’d instinctively glanced over your shoulder at Sans, who was still emitting snore-like sounds. “ _NOTHING CAN WAKE SANS ONCE HE SETS HIS MIND TO BEING ASLEEP. BUT JUST YOU WATCH, AS SOON AS THERE’S FOOD ON THE TABLE HE’LL BE RIGHT THERE, WAITING FOR HIS UNEARNED SHARE!_ ”

Despite the sour tone of voice, Papyrus took a moment to affectionately rub Sans’ skull before finally hopping off the bed, collecting his shoes and strolling out of the room. You were glad he’d waited, as the following clanging of pots and pans would not have been a welcome wakeup call.

You were a little worried about Sans, though. That was awfully loud. And his snoring had ended...hmm...just about the time Papyrus had left the room...

You turned to look at him again. His eyes were wide open, staring at you. The eternal grin was still on his face.

“You can let go now,” you muttered, annoyed.

“oh, i know i _can_ ,” he said, rubbing his ankles against your leg, but after a few seconds he _did_ release you and roll over. You sat up and stretched, wincing at the soreness. Sans patted you again, but it was your arm this time, and it felt like sympathy instead of teasing. But you supposed you couldn’t be sure.

“you’re welcome,” he said, proving your point.

“...For what?”

“for getting papyrus to ‘sleep with you’. and you ‘got _me_ in bed with you’ too. two for one. man, if you were any more ‘spoiled’ you’d be a rotten egg.”

You flushed, and your brow furrowed, but you just let out a sigh. “Don’t make me un-mean what I said.”

“what?”

“About liking you a lot.”

“hmm. well, it wasn’t a fair confession anyway. you said that under duress. inadmissible in court.”

“Well, I meant it. ...And I _still_ mean it.” You cocked your head at him, and he avoided your gaze, which seemed like the closest thing to a confirmation you’d ever get. “And you only tease me because you like me a lot too, don’t you?”

The only response was something that sounded an awful lot like a snore.

You leaned over and kissed his temple, stifling a smug grin at the abrupt discord this caused in his “snoring”. Then you slid out of bed, propped the stuffed animal up on the pillow (oh, _duh_ , it was a skeleton bunny), and went to check on breakfast.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Skin and Bones](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5663485) by [electrickster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/electrickster/pseuds/electrickster)




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